Pakistan's Top Gun

image via PAFWallapers

An air ace is someone who has successfully shot down five enemy aircraft in combat. An air ace-in-a-day is the same feat, however, as is stated, it has been completed in a day. Air aces were relatively common in World War II but have been getting increasingly rarer as modern jet technology has made dogfights obsolete.

For some perspective, the closest any American has come to being an ace since Vietnam has been USAF Colonel Cesar Rodriguez with three air-air kills through various conflicts in the 1990s.

So it's likely that Pakistani pilot Muhammad Mahmood Alam's feat will never ever be matched. What feat? On September 7th, 1965, Alam became an ace by shooting down five enemy aircraft in under a minute.

image via Wikipedia

The man who accomplished more in his life than you ever will, in the span of time it takes to make hot pockets.

Muhammad Mahmood Alam joined the Royal Pakistani Air Force in 1952, becoming an officer in 1953. From there he learned how to fly the F-86 Sabre, an American fighter jet famous for achieving a 12-1 kill ratio of Soviet MiGs over Korea. He wouldn't have to wait long for a war to showcase his mad piloting skills.

In 1965, India and Pakistan were at war in what would be the second of four major wars fought over control of a spit of land in the north called Kashmir; a land so inhospitable that more soldiers are killed by the natural elements than actual combat.

image via the Guardian

And you thought this war was pointless.

On September 6th, 1965, Alam got his first taste of combat when he downed two Indian fighters in aerial combat. Already two fifths of the way to being a jet fighter ace, and awarded Pakistan's highest award for bravery, Alam wouldn't have to wait long to etch himself further into the history and record books.

The very next day, Alam was flying another mission when he and his wingman encountered five Indian Hawker Hunter fighters flying in a neat formation. Alam quickly dispatched of the first one with a missile, whereupon the other four broke from formation.

Rather than attempt combat with Alam, all four Indian fighters raced towards the Indian border in full retreat.

image via Narutobase

Commonly known as the Jack Sparrow technique.

Alam immediately gave chase. Rather than rely on unreliable missiles, Alam switched to his trusty .50 cal machine guns located on his aircraft and carefully lined up his shots. One by one, Alam shot each Indian jet methodically out of the sky like a turkey shoot.

The grand total time from the first missile to the fifth flaming Indian jet? Around one minute, with the last four being shot down in under thirty seconds.

image via RomStation

Just enough for the "Holy-Fucking-Shit" achievement.

Not only does this make him the fastest scoring ace in history, it also makes him the only jet ace-in-a-day. Ever.

Alam would finish up his service in that war by bagging one more Indian jet a week later. He wouldn't retire from the Royal Pakistani Air Force until 1982 at the rank of Air Commodore. In the intervening time he took various commands in the RPAF and at one point was advising the Mujahideen in Afghanistan against the Soviets.

He died in 2013 at the age of 77.